Tom G., Long Island, NY Rehab Story

-Tom G., Long Island, NY

Going to rehab was a great challenge for me. At first, I didn’t consider myself an alcoholic or drug user because, to me, I was able to hold my liquor, so-to-speak. To me, a drunk was someone that smelled like stale beans that you see wobbling around a train station platform begging everyone for a quarter. I was most certainly not a bum…I had a good job, a nice car and I lived in the suburbs.

“Hey, you have a quarter so I can get me a sandwich?” one train station drunk often begged me. “Get a life.” I would always say. I would often wonder how in the world a person can drink their lives away and walk around begging people for money so that they can get drugs and alcohol. GET A JOB, I told one drunk.

I worked very long hours in tech support at a bank. I had deadline after deadline. I had to constantly prove myself at work because if I didn’t, I would get laid off and replaced by a new hire, like many of my co-workers. So, I needed something to keep me awake and a couple of shots of caffeine in my coffee weren’t working anymore. I needed something that would keep me awake like a machine.

When caffeine didn’t work, I tried No-Dose from the local pharmacy. When that wore off, I needed something stronger so I started mixing alcohol in my Latte. When I mixed caffeine and alcohol, it kept me buzzed for hours. Some days I didn’t even go to sleep. I would work straight from 9:00 am to 8:00 am the next day. People in my department would leave work at 5:00 pm and come in at 8:00 am the following day and I would still be there behind my desk on my laptop working to meet deadlines. It worked out pretty well for me the first month or two until the alcohol began to take a great toll on my work performance.

One day, I was so tired, it was only 1:00 pm in the afternoon…I mean, I was exhausted. I kept falling asleep on the job. Some how, I don’t know how but I managed to place a glitch in our company’s computer system which caused some of the customers accounts to zero out. Customers were calling up and complaining that their money was missing, they all had zero balances. The department was on me like white on rice because of the mistake, I was lucky that I wasn’t fired on the spot. It took about 2-3 days to fix the problem.

My alcoholism didn’t only affect me at work. One day, on my way home from work, I fell asleep on the train and I wounded up in the train yard. It was the last stop and I didn’t get off because I was zonked out. I called out for help but the train was vacant. The doors wouldn’t open, I was stuck. Finally, I found an exit. I climbed out of an emergency window. I walked on the track heading back towards the train station and had to purchase another ticket to head back to my regular stop.

I kept missing the train because I couldn’t keep my eyes open to save my life. Finally, when I got home I got my second wind. I guess my double dose of caffeine and extra shots of alcohol kicked in. I decided to treat myself from a hard day of work at the local bar. When I got home I crashed and I didn’t wake up until 4:00 pm the next day. Two days later, my worst nightmare came true; I was fired from my job due to my poor attendance and work performance. I was replaced by a new hire. That’s when I came to the conclusion that I needed help. I had officially hit rock bottom. I was unemployed and a drunk.

I began to do research on drug and alcohol treatment centers on the Internet. I found a few helpful web sites such as drug-rehab-program.us, abusesubstancetreatment.biz and abusedrug.org.

I learned that my alcoholism basically took over my life; I couldn’t stop drinking if I wanted to. I brewed so much coffee that my room-mate thought I was opening a coffee shop. I would then mix anything with it, bourbon, rum and whiskey.

My room-mate told me that I looked like death and I needed help. He gave me a number to a rehabilitation facility out east on Long Island. He told me that his brother had a problem with alcohol and he has been drug-free for about 5 years after completing his drug treatment program. I decided to call the next day.

At drug rehab, I was sort of standoffish. I know it may sound rude but I felt sort of superior to many of the people who were patients there. Daily we would sit in a group and talk and participate in activities administered by one of the drug treatment counselors.

These people were druggies and drunks and I wasn’t. My alcoholism was due to my commitment at work; many of these people were dysfunctional and couldn’t hold down a job if their life depended on it. These were the ones who stood on the corner at 7:25 am begging men and women dressed in business suits for their hard-earned money so that they can invest in their daily fix, drugs and alcohol. At least I was able to afford my daily fix, besides; I didn’t drink alcohol straight from a bottle like many of these jokers. I had class and mixed it with my coffee. When I went to happy hour with the guys I drank in a glass…a glass means class.

It really bothered me that the counselors considered us all equals. I asked if I could have separate sessions from the others because I had absolutely nothing in common with them. Being with them and even seeing them walking down the hallway of the drug rehabilitation center was a constant reminder that I was in the midst of losers. I began to think that I was a loser. How in the world did I end up in a drug treatment program, I often wondered.

Then finally one day I discovered that I wasn’t a loser, those people in the drug treatment program weren’t losers. We were all winners because we decided to do something about it. We basically all had the same common goal…to live an alcohol and drug-free life.

My advice to anyone who is seeking help and you’re not sure where to find out information about drug and alcoholism treatment, there are many websites where you can find information such as: rehabilitationservices.us or drug-treatmentcenter.org. I have been drug-free for 3 ½ years now and becoming drug-free makes me feel as though I can accomplish anything in life, it’s the best decision that I’ve ever made.